Mirror mirror on the wall...

hmm, i'm still in the zone where i still think its all her fault concerning the break-up, that she's not putting enuf effort and all that jazz.

soccer was awesome... though i'm rather tired when i got home just now, infact nearly fell asleep watching tv, something that rarely happens, haha. anyway after soccer, i realized i left my thigh guard at the basketball court while i was showering. thank goodness i havent left my workplace. so after shower, i just walked back there. and while walking back, i made the mistake of calling jacq and blaming her all over again....

i think i've lost count on how many times i've pissed her off concerning this matter. i supposed after the first 9months odd of almost meeting up everyday, i guess she deserves to be with her frens rather than with me.

and i'm still blind to think that she cant be bothered with the relationship when that wasnt the point. i dun understand, why dun i get it? why do i keep thinking "oh its all your fault"
why?

oh to sidetrack a bit, i got a tagboard! sorry but i'm damn suaku concerning this kinda things, never did much to apply my IT in html and etc.

anyway back to the topic. jacq, if ur readin this, i do apologise. i guess i'm too ego and too childish to realize that the problem had nothing to do with each other, rather your own personal problems.

not that i didnt noe your problems, but i'm sorry if i didnt see it that way. i'm honestly, sincerely very very sorry. i deserve all this, its prolly the best thing u've done this year. the fuckin fact just cant get straight in my head.

do you think its late for apologises...? i hope not...

"way to go capt' cranium..." Eduardo from Extreme Ghostbusters

well once again, without realizing, i've dug my own grave and made an improving situation, worst.

geez man, inborn talent is an understatement.
i must be a mutant, no one can be this screwy.
*happens to remember the Singapore Idols*
ok fine, there ARE worst ppl out there but still...

*pulls hair*
ARGH i need to improve myself, and wat have i done so far? zilch. nada. nil. zero. kosong.
i must be destined not to have a gf, or worst, not get married *GASP*

argh.

well cant wait to meet up with sherman and theepan later this day... think we're going out and all. but damn, i cant shave, and i'll look like a caveman. ARGH i hate looking untidy... or worst, like some Al-Qaeda agent. i'm gonna have to figure something out...

once again jacqueline... i am sorry... u do not noe the enorminity of my apology...
infact, it is i who has to look in the mirror and set myself straight and grow up mentally...
gomen-nasai... *bows deeply*

YAY! MUSIC!

finally, after a couple of days and nites of trying to add music, i've finally done it! WOOHOO! *hops around in a baboon war dance*

i guess i'll be permanently migrating from my blurty.com one(http://www.blurty.com/users/moodydork) to the one here. so much customization and control possibilities! hehe. but i dun really have time at the moment to tweak with the settings other then for the background colour. hope to make it look 1337...

anyway woke up so late today that it was pointless to go to work. though i'll still be going for my weekly soccer at work. the trick is to avoid anyone and everyone at work and just go straight to the basketball court, and hope everyone would have left by the time i need to shower haha.

damn chests have gone down, must be the lack of food, damn. funny how force dieting works. when u want the damn tummy to go down, my chest does that. bleh.

anyway got a surprise call last nite. none other from jacqueline herself. she sounded weird, then it hit me, she must have just got home from clubbing. couldnt stop burping and all, talking funny. of coz before i realised i was asking her "so wassup? why'd ya call?"
and she went "cannot miss u is it?"

*sigh*

said she went with lin to cheeky monkeys. at first i was wondering where she got the money since she's just as broke as i am. of coz i forgot that it was wed nite, which means it was ladies nite, free entry, free flow. no wonder she was sounded like that, must have drank quite a bit. apparently she said lin paid for her cab back. was trying to sing i promise you by nsync and all that, geez, she must have been almost gone, i dun think i remember her liking anything bubblegum'ish. she's supposed to be working today too, and she said she'd be able to wake up and all. didnt wanna sleep yet, just want to talk, but dunno wat to talk about. sheesh. was asking me so many questions, esp about sabrina, whether i liked her or not and all that jazz -_-'

told her frankly, i do find her very attractive but there isnt anything more than that. the ans seemed to satisfy her. then just to make her go to sleep offered to sing her a song, any song. and so i sang walking after you by foo fighters. and soon she juts konked out, could her her regular breathing and light snoring... of coz by then it was 4.30am+.

today though, when i asked if she remembered calling me, she said she didnt, too tired and high. pretty redundant to ask such silly qns when i'll noe wat the ans is.

well anyway i've added the song that i wanted to share with u all, esp jacq. and once again i shall repost the lyrics just incase...

Temples of Gold

I see you when it snows
in crystals dancing down
from a sultry sky
when silence is pure and unbreakable

I can see you smiling
in every frozen tear
I can hear you whisper You and I

little did we know
that they were life itself
the days passing by
we both had our share in the sacrifice

once upon a time
we had something beautiful
once upon a time
I thought you and I

take me wherever
the answer lingers in the sand
show me the way as the story unfolds
love is remote
in this wailing winter wonderland
show me the way to the temples of gold

bless me with a kiss
across the universe
when day and night converge
and whisper my name till I fall asleep

tell me tales from days bygone
tell me little lies
tell me once again it's just you and I

New Blog

yay! my new blog lol. didnt really want to migrate but circumstances forced me to. was pretty 'attached' to my blurty.com one, but apparently they dun allow much customization just because its a free account, onli paid ones have the ability for a lot of customization right down to adding music to the blog. bleh. gonna go play with the template now